Growing up, Mother's Day went a little like this:
My parents and some of their friends costumed up like it was Halloween...
Then they pulled high school pranks such as stealing twenty or so House for Sale signs
and placed them in someone's front yard...
Then they retired to the Governor's Tavern where local patrons were so amused
they bought my parents and friends free drinks...
It was my mother's attempt to escape convention;
the stifling brunch with her mother in law and us kids, I guess...
The Mother's Day antics became an annual tradition for years...
My first Mother's Day after Jack was born I wanted to be Super Mom...
I made the impossibly complicated brunch for my parent and in-laws...
As I was weeping over the failed sticky buns,
I learned that perhaps brunch reservations next year may be the best course of action...
This year, after subjecting myself to a day of kid bickering
as my husband tried vainly to give me a good Mother's Day,
I learned that perhaps I should have taken my friend's offer to escape to The Kane County Flea Market
for a half day of country breakfast, antiquing and girlfriend bonding...
Next year I won't feel an ounce of guilt as I disappear to do what I want on my day.
I will be happy and my husband will be relieved.....
My own escape, as it were....
I sat on the floor last night, poring through old photo albums, searching for photos of my mother and I.
She must have been the photographer all those years,
because I had a devil of a time finding even a few shots...
Elusive as she was in front of the camera, Mom was and is ever present in my life...
She has been my boo boo kisser, lemon bar maker, last-minute social studies project helper, stage mother, driving instructor, cheerleader, nurse, travel companion and friend to this day...
She lost her mom in her early thirties to cancer
and I almost lost her in the same way when I was only five years old...
I feel pretty damn lucky to still enjoy the company of my mom
as my gray hairs are becoming more numerous...
Heck, just the other day we went shopping like girlfriends do and it was so much fun...
As a mom myself, the realizations hit pretty quickly how hard a job this mother thing is...
I see so much of her in me at times, it's scarey, but mostly, it's comforting...
We have all read so many email trails or articles about what motherhood means,
but I think Erma Bombeck put it best:
"When the Good Lord was creating mothers He was into His 6th day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."
And the Lord said, "Have you read the specification on this order?"
"She has to be completely washable but not plastic"
"Have 180 movable parts . . . all replaceable"
"Run on black coffee and leftovers"
"Have a lap that disappears when she stands up"
"A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair"
"And 6 pairs of hands"
The angel shook her head slowly and said, "6 pairs of hands....no way."
"It's not the hands that are causing me the problems," said the Lord, "It's the three pairs of eyes that Mothers have to have."
"That's in the standard model?" asked the angel.
The Lord nodded. "One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks 'What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front so that she can look at a child when he goofs and say, 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word."
"Lord," said the angel touching his sleeve gently, "come to bed. Tomorrow . . . "
"I can't," said the Lord, "I'm so close to creating something so close to myself.
Already I have one that heals herself when she is sick . . . can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger . . . and can get a 9 yr. old to stand under a shower."
The angel circled the model of a Mother very slowly. "It's too soft," she sighed.
"But tough!" said the Lord excitedly. "You cannot imagine what this Mother can do or endure."
"Can it think?"
"Not only think, but it can reason and compromise," said the Creator.
Finally, the angel bent over and ran a finger across the cheek. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told You You were trying to put too much into this model."
"It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear."
"What's it for?"
"It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride."
"You are a genius," said the angel.
The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there"
Thank you, Mom, Grandma Allen, Grandma Benson,
Lynnie, Mimi and Mamaw for raising me and Tom so well....
We are who we are because of you, and we love you.....
Hopefully one day my kids will say the same...... Whether I choose to celebrate Mother's Day in costume or not.....
