Friday, January 27, 2012

Alien Abduction...


What alien, in the name of My Favorite Martian,
abducted my children overnight
and substituted angelic likenesses of them in their places? 

Last night they were tired, crabby urchins
with dried catsup on their cheeks
and a stinky funk that can only be described
as eau du smelly sock, or bouquet of dragon breath... 

Their demeanors were ill tempered,
flaring up at the slightest prevocation... 

Now those are my offspring! 


But this morning as I was saddled
with the usual migraine routine
I have lovingly embraced for the last thirty odd years,
two beaming kids emerged from the kitchen,
bearing breakfast in bed... 

Wait...


It was not Mother's Day nor my birthday...

What was this?? 

What a joy to have such a nice surprise..

I was kind of dreading yet another no school day... 

It's like school is a hobby with CPS.... 

Too many days off, I say! 

Anyway, this pleasant alien duo managed
to continue to maintain a sweet as pie attitude
as they helped me mop the floors,
clean bathrooms,
vacuum,
organize the CD collection and dust... 

I was starting to get worried....

THESE ARE NOT MY KIDS! 

To reward these kind space creatures
for their amiable countenances and helpful natures,
I took them to i Cream, a fun, design it yourself ice cream shop... 


You can choose the soy or dairy,
the flavor,
mix-ins and color of the ice cream... 

They freeze it up with this cryogenic thing a mabob and,  voila'! 

Ice cream! 

Alien Jack got green coffee with chocolate bits... 

Alien Kate chose purple vanilla... 

Mysteriously those darn extraterrestrials switched them back
when I was not looking
and the ornery versions have returned from galaxies unknown... 

Oh well, that's okay....

I kind of like the smudgy faces and mischievous looks... 

I'm used to it....

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Buckling Down...



Yep, January is generally the month of deprivation and self flagellation, huh? 

Hitting those resolutions hard,
sweating in the cold air,
eating celery while the cheesy potato soup taunts you from Panera's menu board....

Hopefully you are sticking to your resolutions,
whatever they may be.... 

Hang in there! 

I decided to do The Clean Program again... 

November and December were food free-for-alls around here... 

I ate like it was my last day....

Why just have one brownie
when there is the equivalent of four more in broken pieces in the pan? 

I was like the family dog, finishing plates and going for seconds.... 

The madness had to stop... 

So I had my own personal intervention
when the fat jeans started to fit again... 

I have to say, Clean a second time around is harder,
because you know what you are in for... 

Gnawing hunger,
the monotony of shakes day after day,
and a VERY limited choice of approved lunchtime foods... 

Even the support group online didn't make the time pass faster... 

I made it 17 out of the suggested 21 days
and I lost 10 pounds,
so in the end it was worth it... 

The breaking point came this morning
when I made a mango pineapple shake... 

The pineapple was stringy in the shake
and the mouthfeel was too disgusting for words...

That was it... 

I lunged for the Cheerios
and had a luscious bowl of cereal... 

Amazing how the most simple of foods feel
like luxury when deprived of them.... 

I then broke the cleanse in spectacular fashion... 

More about that later... 

The other way I buckled down this January 
was my quest to get my real estate broker's license.... 

The state of Illinois is doing away with all salesperson's licenses
as of April 2012 and everyone must convert to broker by then... 

It's a pain in the neck, requiring a course
if you don't pass the proficiency test.... 

I put it off for over a year, but finally spent much of the last two weeks
studying the driest laws, terminology and scenarios ever... 

I think the study of hairballs might be a close second.... 

Today was the dreaded test.... 

Thank goodness it was easy... 

After I passed and left the office,
I headed straight to Burger King... 

Whopper Jr. and Onion Rings, please! 

There's no easing back into eating for me...

No sir! 

And dang if it wasn't soooo good! 

So, I'm back among those who eat... 

I will be more forthcoming with some tasty recipes, now that I can actually try them... 

My kids will be happy, too. 

Mama did not feel like cooking when her dinner was a mango pineapple shake...

To share my exhuberance at returning to the world of culinary sanity,
here are a few recipes from my friend Gretta, that look marvelous...

Smashed Potato Soup


Confetti Rice Crispy Treats

Roasted Butter Lemon Shrimp

Butterfinger Blondies


And tonight I will be capping off bustin' the cleanse by going out with a friend for some good wine...

Salut!!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Pinterest


I've found a new black hole....

It sucks up more than its share of my time...

Nooo, it is not Farmville, Call of Duty nor My Little Pet Shop... 

I have just discovered Pinterest... 

Surely most of you have been there before me,
but I am slow on the uptake sometimes.... 

Pinterest has crossed my path over Facebook,
but I didn't have the time to peruse,
so I moved on... 

Now that I have found it,
I am hooked... 

It's endless and captivating and mouthwatering... 

So many good ideas from so many interesting people... 

One friend has a food board that sends me reeling....
all those delicious recipes... 

Another has such gorgeous outfits put together....

Makes me want to wear them! 

You can find boards for anything...

French bulldogs,
anything pink,
Valentine's Day stuff,
mustard....
you name it! 

And you can create your own unique boards... 

What a cool website! 

I should be studying for my broker's exam right now,
the laundry is piled sky high
and my house looks like fifteen trolls spent the night,

But I......    

CAN'T    

PULL    

MYSELF   

AWAY... 

Help! 

Is there a support group for Pinterest?

I am making this for dinner (no cheese, though).  Yep, found it on Pinterest.....

Slow Cooker Parmesan Honey Pork Roast Recipe



It's hard to make slow-cooked food look pretty . . . and this pork seriously fell apart when I tried to take it out of the slow cooker!
So don't judge this by it's picture . . . I promise that this recipe is delicious! My husband even said that this is one of his favorite Sunday dinners.

Ingredients:

1 (2-3 pound) boneless pork roast
2/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup honey
3 Tbsp soy sauce
2 Tbsp dried basil
2 Tbsp minced garlic
2 Tbsp olive oil
1/2 tsp salt
2 Tbsp cornstarch
1/4 cup cold water

Spray slow cooker with non-stick cooking spray. Place roast in slow cooker. In a small bowl, combine the cheese, honey, soy sauce, basil, garlic, oil and salt; pour over pork. Cover and cook on low for 6-7 hours or until a meat thermometer reads 160°.
Remove meat to a serving platter; keep warm. Skim fat from cooking juices; transfer to a small saucepan. Bring liquid to a boil. Combine cornstarch and water until smooth. Gradually stir into pan. Bring to a boil; cook and stir for 2 minutes or until thickened. Slice roast; serve with gravy (I also made mashed potatoes and the gravy was delicious on them!).

Recipe adapted from Everyday Tastes

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sunday Morning Hockey...


What, in the Wide World of Sports was I thinking when I signed Jack up for Sunday morning hockey?!

7:00 am on SUNDAY?? 

I realize there are those hockey diehards who play at all kinds of crazy hours,
but in the back of my mind, I thought my husband,
who played hockey as a kid,
would be in charge of this one.... 

Little did I remember that the man travels... a lot. 

So while he is jetting home from Frankfurt this morning,
probably sipping a mimosa from his business class seat,
I am awakened at 5:45 am by a very alert son,
who is noisily bedecking himself in hockey gear... 

Hmmm...where would I rather be....


Between the warm and snuggly flannel sheets or slogging a massive hockey bag
across the ice covered parking lot
before the sun rises? 

Tough choice, I know... 

I am a glutton for punishment.... 

At least we planned ahead and laid out all the gear
on Jack's bedroom floor last night... 

There would be no last minute, "Where's my cup?!"
or panicked searches for an elbow pad... 

I even made the kids breakfast burritos last night
in anticipation of a breakfast rush... 

Yeah...where's my halo....  


Poor Kate, who is starting a cold,
was the real trooper of the morning, hauling herself out of bed,
into clothes and into cold weather gear... 

At he rink, she perked up and even made a new friend
as we watched the boys scrimmage for an hour... 

I made a friend, too,
so I guess it was worth it... 

Tommy, beware, that I am counting on you for the rest of these Sundays... 

I can handle all the other ferrying around ,
but Sunday is YOURS, Babe...


'Scuse me, but I'm going back to bed now....


I did not make this breakfast burrito...
Mine was simply fried sausage, scrambled eggs and some cheese inside a tortilla. 
Here is Ree's version....way tastier!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Hot Chocolate

 
"Storm Tracker 2012!!!"  

Folks, you might want to stay home 
because we may get 6 whole inches of snow!!!  

For those of us in the good old Midwest as kids, 
six to ten inches of snow was no big whoop...  

The weatherman would sort of roll his eyes 
during his segment of the evening news 
and run through the snowy forecast...  

No biggie...  

"It's snowing again... "

These days they practically call out 
the National Guard if it drizzles... 

So, Mother Nature was quite tardy this year, 
bringing us our first real snowfall of the season today... 

It's like Christmas all over again, 
what with the anticipation and excitement...

The kids can hardly wait to get out of school to play
in the newly fallen snow...

"I'm gonna make snow angels!" Kate declared. 

My mother loved the snow if only for the fact 
that we would disappear into the ravine 
across the street to sled for hours...  

It was steep and bowl shaped, 
with a small hill at the bottom... 

If you hit that hill just right, 
you and your sled would fly into the air, 
 and cross atmospheres before descending
into the creek at the far end...  

My brother would ice down that little hill
just to amp up the trajectory to warp speed...
  

We and the neighborhood kids would sled 
until we couldn't feel our fingers and toes anymore...  

We would emerge into the warm house, 
full of ice burrs on our clothes 
and cheeks as pink as peonies in May...

And the best part would be that Mom 
would have the liquid chocolate piping hot, 
along with some cookies on a plate... 

Sounds like a commercial for Toll House cookies?  


Well, it was awesome.  

So today is a hot chocolate day...

I stopped by my favorite Hispanic market 
this morning to buy Abuelita's Hot Chocolate... 

My current entrepreneurial idol, Ree Drummond, 

Let's give it a try, shall we?  

As for the cookies, store bought is going to have to do...  

I'm not channeling June Cleaver today...


Saturday, January 7, 2012

The Angelfish of Death...



Oops, I did it again... 

Abby and Bubbles II have expired, too... 

I realize now that in this photo, they are begging for help...

In the words of Kate,
"Every morning we wake up and the fish are DEAD!"... 

It's gotta be the water...  

Retro the beta fish lasted about four months,
which is a nice long spell in these parts,
comparatively speaking...

I think he got what is commonly known as "Ick"
and slowly deteriorated into the fishy beyond... 

After Retro's passing, I rinsed the tank
and soaked it with a little bleach
for a couple of weeks before surprising the kids
with a trip to the major chain pet supply store... 

What was supposed to be a happy choosing of two new goldfish
devolved into a heated discussion why no furry rodents
would be coming home with us...

"But MOM, I will take care of the guinea pig,
I PROMISE!"

Look, I grew up with parakeets, frogs, turtles,
gerbils, hamsters, cats, dogs and rabbits. 
Furry rodents smell and make lots of noise at three am... 

Best of all, they escape
and then die in the ductwork of the house... 

Nope, ain't happenin' in my house....

Back to the fish...

So we bought Bubbles I and Skippy,
and all sorts of conditioners, food, ammonia remover,
you name it... 

Went home and did what I was told...

Slipped the happy little fishies into Roscoe's clean tank...

The fish were on the chunky side
and they seemed a little cramped in the beta tank... 

And a little lethargic... 

I figured the trip wore them out...

Who knew? 

In the morning they had that telltale dead look...

You know, when they do the motionless sidestroke? 

Yep...

So, we took the whole tank,
containing the fish carcasses, to the pet store. 

The kind sales girl recommended a larger tank
with an aerator and some more liquid potions
to condition the water....

This goldfish thing was starting to get expensive,
but I relented since they are a lot less bank
than a purebred Persian kitten at this point... 

This time, Kate picked out a black fish
and named her Abby... 

Jack stayed with the goldfish
and named him Bubbles II... 

Went home, did was I was told with the water
and introduced Abby and Bubbles II
to their pretty new lit tank... 

They swam around happily, although I noticed Bubbles II
looked a little sluggish as I went off to bed... 

In the morning, I'll be darned if those fish took a memo
from the previous two and did the same sidestroke! 

I started to feel like the Grim Reaper of fish... 

We trudged back to the pet store,
with two lumps of bait in the Ziploc.... 

The sales girl happened to be by the front door,
giving out pizza.... 

It was the grand opening... 

She saw the look on my face and knew that I'd done it again...

She quickly escorted me away from the throngs
of happy customers, not wanting them to see my dead fish... 

Well, now I am reconditioning the water for a few days
before introducing only one scaled victim
to my tank of death... 

Wish me luck... 

Kate's ant farm is our next adventure into life and death....

Can't wait....

I figured it would be in bad taste to show a fish recipe,
so instead I'll share a tutorial from Steamy Kitchen that looks fun for the start of the year...


MEMORY JAR
We keep this vintage pale blue canning jar on the kitchen counter with a stack of colorful paper and a marker. Every few days, one of us will jot down something that made our family laugh or smile. On New Year’s Eve, we’ll be emptying out the jar, unfolding each paper and reading them one by one.
Next year, a new jar to begin again — and the best part is we can bring out past jars anytime to remember the little things that shaped our lives.
A memory jar is more fun than a journal – as anyone in the family can contribute to it. The best is when one of us secretly writes memory and quietly slips it into the jar. I can’t wait to read some of the notes my kids have written all year long.
Inside the jar, we also keep little silver trinkets and charms. Sometimes one of us will have a bad day, need a little extra reminder for compassion or a good luck charm on a spelling test. These are little enough to put into your pocket to serve as a extra oomph of support for the day. We used to have a small heart too – I carried around the small silver heart one day and ended up giving it to a stranger I came across, who needed a little love.

The charms are indeed magical – and I encourage my kids to give them to a friend or stranger who could use a bit of magic.
If you’d like to create a memory jar, here’s what I used:
Vintage mason jar – quart size: you can find these on eBay or Etsy. Try to get one with a lid so you can store each year’s memory jar on a shelf. The photo below is from Mason Galore on Etsy.

The colorful notepad is from Staples – even though it looks like a Post-It note, there is no sticky backing. Just a pretty spiral of colorful paper. $3.79 for 600 sheets.

You can also use scrapbook paper and cut them into 4″x4″ squares. I love the ones that come in a giant pad from Michael’s.
The silver charms were bought at a local gift shop near my home. There are so many gorgeous handmade ones on Etsy: sterling silver wishbone, faith angel wing, dragonfly word charms, copper pocket heart.
From Cartelle $28: