Cosmic Collision...

It almost didn't happen...  

We came one dust laden Q-Tip away 

from spinning into different orbits...

 

That's when I wonder if things are meant to be;

 if the fates puppet us around in this life 

or if dumb luck is in play 

with what direction we end up careening...  

It had been about ten days

since T$ and I met at the Rock Bottom Brewery...  

After a plate of nachos and a few beers, 

T$ declared he was going to

 "Take me to Vegas and marry me!"...  

A brash announcement, given we had known each other 

about seventy-five minutes at that point... 

Two spit swappin' sessions in the car 

and a little over a week later, 

T$ invited me to meet his best friend and others 

 in the Gold Coast for dinner and drinks...  

I was excited...  

T$ was upbeat, handsome 

and he made me feel so comfortable, 

unlike the neurotic guys I had been seeing of late...  

Having been in the dating jungle for about ten years,

there were some stories to tell...

Most of them not good...

Our date was on a Saturday in April 

and I spent most of the morning

doing some spring cleaning of my tiny apartment...  

I got a bit OCD and even cleaned the phone 

with a Q-Tip soaked in rubbing alcohol...   

 Long before T$ was due to pick me up, 

I chose my outfit and primped for this important evening...  

After all, I was meeting his best friend 

and their close buddies! 

This was super scrutiny...  

I had to pass the test...  

After getting dressed, there was time to spare, 

so I watched Seinfeld reruns as the late afternoon

 turned to evening...  

Since we had just met, 

there was no way to know if T$

 was the punctual type...  

His arrival time came and there was no buzz 

from the apartment entrance...  

Fifteen minutes passed, and I started to wonder...  

Thirty minutes and worry gnawed at me...  

Was I being stood up?  

T$ did not seem like that kind of guy...  

He was so sweet, so real...  

I didn't want to call him, 

because it would be too humiliating

 if he WAS blowing me off...  

Forty five minutes later... 

 I looked out the window...  

No white Tahoe...
  

Even though the phone didn't ring,

 I reflexively went over to check 

the answering machine for messages...  

The message light blinked 3!  

I listened to the first message 

and T$ said he was downstairs,

 ringing my buzzer...

HUH???

There was no buzz! 

 I was sitting five feet from the intercom!

Second message stated that now he was across the street, 

at the cafe, waiting to see if I would come home...  

My apartment was dark 

because I was just waiting for him 

to arrive while watching TV...  

Third message went something like this,

 "Lori, this is Tom.  I guess you aren't home.  

I thought we were going out tonight.  

Oh well, see you around..."  

See you around???  

That is the man phrase for "You have just been dumped!!!"  

I felt sick, realizing that my freakish cleaning routine 

had inadvertently turned off the phone ringer 

AND the front door buzzer must have broken

 in the last 24 hours...  

How could such a coincidence of events 

have such a dramatic impact on my love life?!  

I decided that I needed to take this situation 

into my own hands and I called T$...  

He was rather frosty on the phone 

and let me know that if I wished to join him and his friends

 I could find my own way
to meet them in the city...  

I grabbed my purse and ran to hail a cab...  

My heart was beating fast 

as I mentally searched for a way

 to repair the damage that had been done...  

What did Tom tell his friends?  

Did they now hate me?  

Would I have struck out early in the game? 

 Unfortunately for me, I did not have much cash in my wallet

and I had to jump out of the taxi

 four blocks away once the fare reached my limit...  

I ran the whole way to Mary's condo...  

All eyes fell on me as I entered the room, 

gasping for air...  

Smiling nervously, I recounted the story, 

hoping they would believe the ridiculousness of the

 "Three's Company" scenario...  

Well, by the time I finished my second glass of wine, 

T$ had his arm around me

 and the warm hospitality of his friends 

made me feel accepted...  

Given that T$ had been involved
with a psycho case or two in his past, 

his pals were understandably protective... 

 To learn that I was somewhat normal (hah!) 

came as a relief, I guess...  

Over fourteen years later, T$'s dear friends 

are also my cherished pals...  

We still laugh about that evening 

where I almost wasn't the one...  

I guess the planets were aligned, after all...

Oh, and by the way, T$ did take me to Vegas

 and marry me...