Sometimes you witness something
and you are sure it must be
a sign of the apocalypse...
America is one wacky place,
and from the looks of this video,
especially in Florida...
No offense, but the Sunshine State seems to
attract more than the average number
of maladjusted humans...
I am allowed to say that because I lived there
for six years and watched the mayhem happen....
All the time...
Okay, so just watch this video
and we will discuss afterward...
My best friend, Chris, showed me this video
and I am sure it is only because
I won't judge her sanity for sharing it with me...
Sisters love each other,
even when they share strange,
disgusting and odd shit....
What was your reaction?
Mine was WTF????
I mean, this video was wrong on so many levels...
I can hardly eat my carmelized onion and sausage pizza
right now because I am so grossed and weirded out.
Did you ask yourself the following questions...
1. Why did her father videotape his daughter
holding a dead, wild animal?
2. Why did he not, upon seeing her cradle
said dead, wild animal in her arms,
instinctively drop the damn camera,
run to her and disengage it
from her chubby little hands?
3. Why did the mother stand there
like Edvard Munch's "The Scream"
instead of removing the dead squirrel
from her precious daughter?
4. Why did the mother then take off?
5. Was she headed to the Mini Mart
for a carton of Pall Mall's?
6. Was she going to the "Last Call"
to drink the image from her mind?
7. Why does this little girl love the dead squirrel?
Does it complete her set of dead rats,
mice, snakes and pelicans?
And, OMG...
Did she just make the squirrel nod, yes???
8. Why doesn't McDonald's use this idea
as a hot new toy for their Happy Meals?
9. Why does Daddy act like the greyhound is the bad guy?
Daddy wins that title,
HANDS DOWN!
10. Does hygiene ever play a part in this story?
Perhaps Little Cutie needs a peroxide bath,
followed by a fun party at the pediatrician's office
for rabies shots.
"It's just like Mommy's Botox, Honey..."
11. And what up with running in the front yard in undies?
I have a feeling this is not an isolated event...
12. Yup, this is snarky, but when your flower pots on your front stoop
look like they last contained plants
during the Reagan administration
and the front lawn could double as pasture,
you gotta wonder if there are chickens out back
or if the siblings are taking taxidermy as a hobby...
13. Last one: Do you think Daddy
is hoping to win $10,000
on America's Funniest Videos?
Something is rotten in Denmark...
I know... this is somewhat of a diversion
from my usual, happy recipe sharing blogs,
but when you look at something that shocks you
and then makes you laugh in disbelief,
sometimes you must share it with good friends.
Wow.
That was something....
No way I am going to talk food today....
Back to normal tomorrow...
Promise.
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