Primo Model Making....

 

Okay, so what was your grade school project?  

What did you have to create 

for a major homework assignment?

 

Did you decide the night before 

was ample time to tell your parents about it? 

Honestly, I'd love to hear from you...  

Those are the best stories!  

For me, it was the mud adobe huts 

Dad and I constructed for the Navajo Indian unit...  

It was messy, but fun to make...

  

Then there was the "United States Parade of Floats"

in fifth grade...  

Each of us was given a state 

and we had to research its particulars 

and reflect the state facts and symbols 

on a little parade float...  

It was right in my wheel house...

Oh, how I hoped for Hawaii, California 

or even mountainous Colorado...  

Instead, I drew New Hampshire out of the bowl...  

My enthusiasm was instantly deflated...  

I mean, no offense, but what is interesting 

about New Hampshire?!  

That New Hampshire was one of the original thirteen colonies 

or that the ladybug is the "State Insect"?  

I might have perked up had I known 

that the world's largest meatball 

was baked in New Hampshire 

or that the state has some strange laws, like:

 

Any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted 

with a device to gather its feces.

 

You may not run machinery on Sundays.

 

On Sundays citizens may not relieve themselves 

while looking up.

 

You may not tap your feet, nod your head, 

or in any way keep time to the music 

in a tavern, restaurant, or cafe.

 

You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing 

to pay off a gambling debt.

 

It is considered an offense to check into a hotel 

under an assumed name.

 

But I digress...   

 

It was not a favorite assignment, to be sure...

Then there was the eighth grade science project:  

 

Operation Six Legs...

 

We were taught, in class, how to murder bugs in a jar, 

using rubbing alcohol soaked cotton balls...  

 

We had to be skilled in insect extermination 

in order to curate our entomologic taxidermy presentations...  

 

In other words, we had to kill a whole variety of bees,

 butterflies, moths, wasps, 

walking sticks, aphids, and flies...  

 

Then we had to impale them with dressmaker pins,

to a labeled foam core board,

 in an organized, scientific manner...  

 

I cannot properly describe to you 

my intense dislike of this assignment...  

 

There is nothing more lovely 

than hunting angry bumble bees 

on a hot, September day, 

in a dry scratchy field of waist high weeds...  

 

Once caught, my goosebumps looked like hives 

as I watched the bug frantically smash around the jar 

in the throes of death...  

 

Finally the "gas" would sent him to the next world...  

 

I would wait an extra long time 

before opening the jar....

Just in case...  

 

To this day, I cannot stand the smell of rubbing alcohol 

and large, flying insects give me the heebie jeebies...

So, fast forward to Kate's declaration yesterday 

that she must produce something about the Great Wall of China, 

by the next day...

 

Sigh...

  

Thank you, Dear Jesus, for the Internet...

 

Not only did I find an excellent project 

in about 3.2 seconds, 

but the craft was actually doable for a first grader...

 

Many Thanks to Confessions of a Homeschooler , photo above,

for this idea!

 

We were going to build that Great Wall, 

by gum, with styrofoam bricks and some glue! 

The hardest part was locating the bricks, 

thanks to a minor cluster at the craft store, 

but the rest of the elements were readily available...

I set everything out before the kids 

came home from school... 

 

Jack, Mr. Curiosity, could not have possibly stood by 

and not helped, so he did....

 

Kate screamed at him only a few times, 

so I considered that a success...  

 

Kate is still getting the hang of hot glue, 

and with Jack supervising the construction, 

I think it came out pretty well... 

 

 

It was so cute watching Kate carefully tote her Great Wall 

toward school this morning...  

 

Friday, the school opens up to parents 

and all of the kids display their projects...  

 

Since China is the first grade unit of study, 

I am hoping to whip up a quick kimono top 

for Kate to wear...  

 

 

But I have a migraine today, 

so it may not happen...

 

Back in the day, it sure would have helped my parents 

to have the Internet to turn to...

  

 

It saved my ass yesterday!