One thing I won't ever claim to be is a runner...
It's a love/hate relationship I have
with the whole running thing...
Aspiring to look like those impossibly fit models
in the Title Nine and Athleta catalogs,
I slog my humble one mile circuit in the morning...
A few years ago, I survived the first few weeks
of low motivation, winded lungs and complaining joints
to string together a real running routine...
I even ventured beyond my well worn route
to farther reaches on occasion...
It felt good, having more toned muscles
and stronger wind capacity....
My husband rewarded me with admiring comments
and amorous hugs...
But then hip trouble and probably bronchitis
interrupted my health and fitness streak...
It all went down the drain after that,
with spotty performances for a couple of years...
I couldn't get back in the groove...
There were too many excuses to not run:
Morning meetings at school,
doughnuts to make for the guys at the factory,
flannel sheets that called to me...
It felt rotten to have lost the tone and cardiovascular prowess,
but not rotten enough to get my posterior to move...
Until Facebook...
Lately, some of my FB friends have been
doing amazing things with their bodies...
Usually it annoys me to no end to hear
about yet another 5k conquered
or how certain protein supplements
are the key to a perfect life...
As a food lover, the quote:
"Nothing tastes as good as fitness feels"
makes me want to gag...
Sorry, but a slice of Devils Food cake
with a cold glass of milk tastes WAY BETTER
than screaming, burning muscles...
Sorry, just sayin'...
And then some ladies ran some amazing marathons,
at the tender age of forty-something,
to support a sick friend....
And another friend, who shrank from the sight
of any activity that might generate a hint of sweat,
worked herself from the couch to a half marathon in six months...
It was truly inspirational...
The last straw caught me by surprise...
One of my super fit friends,
who lives and breathes marathons,
posted The Holiday Running Streak...
In a nutshell, the challenge asks you to just move your body,
every day, from Thanksgiving until New Years Day...
That was it...
My body was calling me to rejuvinate my wiggly thighs,
Bingo arms and jelly-like belly to something stronger...
I have been going to a Pilates class once a week
since September, but I knew that was not nearly enough
to improve this old bod much...
The Holiday Running Streak spoke to me....
Could I run every day for thirty nine days?
I wanted to try...
The first three days were hell...
On the first day, Thanksgiving, the wind blew so hard
it almost knocked me off my feet....
It took all I had to leave the warmth
of the flannel sheets on that dark, cold morning...
Day Two was less windy,
but my lungs and cottony mouth protested loudly...
My stomach announced on Day Three
that eating before running was NOT a smart idea...
After that, hitting the bricks got easier each day until Day Eight...
Good Lord, old running shoes
give up on the eighth day
and my shins cried out for mercy...
Shin splints, the runner's deal breaker...
Oh, sorry....
I am not a runner...
Right...
Although, the budget could ill afford
a new pair of running shoes during the holidays,
there was no choice but to hit the Sports Authority,
coupons in hand, to find the most economical Asics for sale...
Luckily, they were to be had...
Here are my thoughts on running shoes...
If I am about to pound the pavement,
subjecting my joints to maximum punishment,
while shamelessly exhibiting the worst running gait
(think lame giraffe),
then at least the shoes should be dreamy clouds
of low impact heaven...
There should be so much gel and cushion
that running should feel like flying, don't you think?
Ok, maybe an experience similar
to that of a hovercraft, then, right?
The shoes should change color,
in a chameleon-like fashion,
to complement whatever running gear I am wearing...
That's easy, since I have had the same sad running clothes
for about the last six years,
consisting of three running skirts
and three jog bras...
The shoes should always stay tied
to prevent humiliating wipeouts
and they should have dog shit detectors...
If any irritating juts in the pavement should approach,
those shoes should propel me over them
in a James Bond-like maneuver...
You know, jets or rockets...
Maybe I am asking too much,
but the fact that I talked myself into getting out of bed,
when my head, feet, lungs, quads, hips and arms
had very good arguments for sleeping in
is reason enough to have miraculous shoes
to help me get the job done...
Let's just say, it's nice to have new kicks
and the gel insoles will have to do...
Only 28 days to go...
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